take care

painting by me

take care, my love,

for all the glances from me to you in soft dark corners of our bed

for all the times you were afraid and i did laugh 

because nothing could have happened while i was still there

for all the sighs i've heard watching you sleep

for all the betimes moments i coated your feet not to catch cold

for all your expectations story-told to me in perfect midnight silence

for all the sunshines of the sunrise

and all the stars hung hard-by the moon

for all the days to come and hopes of days to be

for all the days past and memories bygone

for my sake at least if that matters

or for the sake of our child in that gentle dreaming time we had

for all the voices in the world just so you can hear me!

take care, my love,

good care of you...

BAR

drawing by me

tanjesc dupa cliseul american din cinema-ul anilor '50: dupa barul unde un barbat singur bea o cafea sau un whiskey, o femeie singura bea si ea ceva la doua scaune in dreapta si barmanul e omul perfect cu care sa iti sfarsesti seara-noaptea in cazul unui esec amoros fie el chiar si de o noapte, fie el chiar si incercarea timida catre dreapta, doua scaune distanta.

cum ne-a intrat cliseul asta in retina si in minte, cum iese pana si din suflet cand ajungi intr-un bar, unde te asezi la un scaun, iti iei o cafea sau un whiskey, o femeie bea si ea ceva, la bar doua scaune langa sau la o masa, singura... si toate filmele ce incep astfel sau toate povestile cu o astfel de scenografie pentru intriga sau o anume secventa din cine-stie-ce desfasurare a unor actiuni ce au la baza conflicte amoroase, ies parca din casuta aceea din tine - propriul tau cinema se desfasoara langa tine, in tine. si vrei sa cuprinda tot barul in care te afli. vrei filmul sa iasa de pe celuloid si sa se auda in spate: actiune! tu sa fi in filmul ala sau nici macar sa nu fie film ci sa se dovedeasca asa a fi realitatea. iar de actiunea amoroasa e menita a esua, macar iti ramane barmanul... dar noi, aici, nu avem cultura acestui barman, el nu exista si nu faci decat sa il cauti amagit prin toate barurile sau speluncile din proximitatea-ti geografica.

tanjesc dupa acel bar, dupa acel barman. nu imi ramane decat sa imi iau un trench-coat si o palarie, sa imi ridic gulerul si sa le spun tuturor ca ma numesc Humphrey.

and who knows... maybe one day i'll find the beginning of a beautiful friendship...

until then i just remember there is so much beauty in the world and i enjoy it.

good night

elements

i wish to make a drop of water

to bathe in.

sank inside there will be only silence.

maybe this way i'll be able to hear the world

to acknowledge it.

who knows, maybe i'll even hear someone calling me

(in my drop of water i will understand her voice).

i wish to make a breeze of wind

to waft along.

scavenged aside blowing there will be only music.

maybe this way i'll be able to dance the world

to enjoy it.

who knows, maybe i'll even hear someone sing for me

(along with my wind i will understand her words).

i wish to make a grain of earth

to dig myself in.

buried inside there will be only space

to feel it.

who knows, maybe i'll even touch someone's skin

(within my earth i will understand her body).

scared to be burnt no more

i will make a flame of fire

to shove it in my soul.

blazing inside out there will be only life.

this way i'll be able to live

fully.

i know i'll find someone to live with me

(both of us burning will understand).

the CHAOS merchant

Hieronymus Bosch - the Garden of the Earthly Delight

all for sale!

all at one price!

i issue chaos to the innocents

to the hungry ones and the naked

to the unborn and the new lights

to the scared ones and the hidden

i issue chaos to anyone who needs anything happening in their lives.

i embrace chaos

so i'm the best salesman to be.

with no regard for what to happen

with no regret for what to be

i issue chaos to the loved ones and for the lonely the same fee.

i issue chaos from my unfathomable soul

with no bottom to be found.

completely full and empty of love and hate at the same time

i give away from my kindness and for my virulence

waiting to see the turn up.

not afraid of chaos

preaching it

memorizing faces

just to find them again in what follows.

you need no ticket

need no prepare for

need no answer to

just be.

be in chaos with me. 

conjugare la persoana intai

photo from www.thoughtsow.com

eu vreau.

e primul lucru spus.

fericire gasesti trecandu-l.

eu cred.

si-mi apare indoiala.

oh, Toma, ce mostenire ne lasasi!

eu sper.

caci vise am o mie.

Pandora martora o chem.

eu spun.

incet drumul apare.

cuvintele-mi caramizi zidesc.

eu stiu.

si niciodata nu e de ajuns.

la ce bun, de nu ma duce nicaieri?

eu simt.

asa cum toti stiam odata.

mai mult nu este-n acest timp.

eu fac.

din tot ce stiu si simt.

si facerea imi este trai!